Hmmmmph.

Well I'm currently listening to my Steve Miller Band Pandora radio station to try and calm/relax myself.
I'm at a loss.

So update from last post. I had an interview for that job. After thinking about it, I decided it was not something I could commit to, so I called them and told them I was no longer interested.
No problem, because I have that CNA class to take during winter break, right??? NO!
Yesterday I got an e-mail saying they cancelled it. I can take the class in November (UM no, human body is currently overwhelming my brain and time to take an additional class) or I could take it in January, but they don't have the dates of the class set up. January is a potential, but I was kind of just thrown a huge curve ball. Because once again, my plan A and plan B both failed and I don't have a plan C! YIKES.
So I called around today for CNA classes near to me during December, but no luck. So I think during Thanksgiving break I might apply to volunteer at meadowlark, because I'm still desperately trying to get patient contact hours. All this junk is just so I can go to PA school.

I'm trying to figure out why God keeps saying no or not right now to this CNA class. I don't get it. and I hate to say it, but I'm starting to get angry and frustrated. Maybe I'm not supposed to make Plan A and Plan B (and now Plan C). But I have to. Especially trying to get into extremely competitive schools. Am I not supposed to go to PA school? That's my biggest fear, because I really want to, but now I'm second guessing as to what my "calling" is. And... There's really no plan B after I graduate, which for me is even scarier.

I turned 22 on Tuesday. I feel like an old geezer.

On a brighter note: Bobby came home yesterday! He'll be visiting for 2 weeks, and we're celebrating my b-day with the whole family tomorrow and I'm very excited!
On another brighter note: My optometrists office was able to exchange my contacts without charge so now I can see for the next 6 months.

So back to studying. Pray for me. For real, I seriously need it. I'm super insecure, unsure, shocked right now. The future is so scary, and it's especially scary when for the past 4 years you've had one goal in mind and it's kind of slowly breaking down.